Funny One Liners For Him

Top 100 funniest one-liners. Funny One-Liners On Life.

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Take my advice Im not using it.

. I was blinded by your beauty so I need your name and number for insurance reasons. 8791 592 votes. Some cause happiness wherever they go.

Here are some funny one liners to help you out. When he talks it isnt a. Most of these cute one liners are from the iconic comedians and others are from random people.

Eagles may soar but weasels dont get sucked into jet engines. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad Lifes like a bird. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Turns out good players are hard to find. Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits. Youre so beautiful you made me forget my pick up line.

Your smile must be a black hole nothing can escape its pull. A clean house is a sign of a misspent life. Via Getty ImagesMichael Heim EyeEm.

1 I asked God for a bike but I know God doesnt work that way. A man is at the funeral of an old friend. If everything seems to be coming your way youre probably in the wrong lane.

Thats when I knew we werent gonna work out. Do not walk behind me for I may not lead. Humor is known to provide positive health effects on individuals by producing endorphins that are 500 times more.

Life is a terminal disease. But all mine ever says is goodbye. Give a man a poisonous fish and youll feed him for the rest of his life.

That says a lot. If life gets you. Of course I wouldnt say anything about her unless I could say something good.

Honesty may be the best policy but its important to remember that apparently by elimination dishonesty is the second. The last thing I want to do is hurt you my love. Our most popular categories.

If you cant seem to. And oh boy is this good. I love you more than pizza and thats saying a lot.

Your hand fits in mine like its made just for me. With you I can be myself. Romantic pick-up lines for him.

The wife says that yes he. Moses was leading his people through the desert for 40 years. 8247 1288 votes.

If you are looking for funny single liners youve come to the right. Give a man a fish and youll feed him for a day. It seems even in Biblical times men avoided asking the way.

Funny One Liners. By Ramon March 22 2010. Top 100 Funny Jokes Hilarious Jokes New Jokes Dark Humor One-Liners Clean Jokes Funny Sayings Funny Riddles Best Puns Knock Knock.

But all mine ever says is goodbye Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. It is a trap. Its pretty cute until it poops on your.

For instance its awkward to say your pick-up line when youre in the mall or office but its alright if youre at a bar or cocktail party where the ambiance is friendlier and more. He approaches the dead mans wife and asks if he could say a word. I swear to drunk Im not God but seriously stay in drugs eat school and dont do.

You make my life easier with your disarming smiles. Funny One Liners for Husband. I asked my date to meet me at the gym today.

Im an archaeologist and my life is in ruins. 59 Funny and Witty Oneliners. But dont worry it is at the bottom of the things I want to do.

A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor You have to help me I think Im shrinking Now settle down the doctor calmly told. 75 Funny What Do You Call Jokes. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Hand-Picked Collection to Make You Laugh. Dont trust atoms they make up. All they said was Bach Bach Bach.

11 Clean One Liner Jokes. That way when you criticize them youre a mile away and you have their shoes. She didnt show up.

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